#001 - (Daffodil) interviewed by M. Pickett.

** Notes: Recruit has been given standard-issue yellow gas mask to protect employees from making or maintaining eye contact. See log #001 for evidence of potential side effects.

P: What's your name?

Recruit #001 remains silent.

P: "Are you... alright?"

Recruit nods.

P: "Do you.. know your name?"

Recruit shakes their head.

P: "Okay. Well uh, I don't just want to note you down as "recruit 01." That sounds kinda... I can't think of the word. But is there something else you'd like me to call you for now?"

Recruit mimics writing on a piece of paper.

P: "Oh yeah yeah, lemme get you that."

Paper and pen provided to recruit.

Recruit writes on paper. All further dialogue from the recruit is transcripted from their written responses.

D: "Daffodil."

P: "Daffodil? Did you just think of that on the spot?"

Recruit remains silent.

P: "Sorry sorry, didn't mean to be rude or anything. Um, I'm just getting some basic information from you so we can get you through the onboarding process. I don't know why they don't just give you a form or something."

Daffodil shrugs.

P: "Whatever. It's all corporate cookie dough to me."

Daffodil giggles under the mask.

P: "Hah, yeah. Uh, anyways, what's your date of birth?"

D: "Don't remember."

P: "Ah. Do you know how old you are...?"

D: "Maybe 20? I feel like that's right."

P: "Good enough. What are your pronouns?"

D: "Why are you asking?"

P: "It's more for internal documents than anything. We monitor mercenaries very closely on the field."

D: "they/them"

P: "Cool. What do you consider your strengths and weaknesses?

Daffodil takes longer to answer.

D: "I'm pretty responsible, I think that's a strength. I consider myself pretty strong. I'm not good with time management."

P: "That's fine, we pretty much manage your time for you, in a way. How do you deal with pressure?"

D: "I have a habit of getting paranoid under pressure."

P: "Okay. It'd be a good idea to mention this to your medic when you get assigned to a team. Speaking of which. Do you prefer working independently or in a team?

D: "I'll do either, but I prefer being able to rely on a group."

P: "How comfortable are you with blood?"

Daffodil cocks their head.

P: "I can't really give you specifics but. Suffice to say being a mercenary involves quite a bit of blood."

D: "I'm not bothered by gore."

P: "That's good. If you knew that someone would return perfectly fine afterwards, how comfortable would you be with fatally wounding them?"

P: "Uh, don't think too hard about that question either."

D: "I guess I'd be okay with it?"

P: "Okay yeah. If you knew that you would return perfectly fine afterwards, would you be willing to be fatally wounded while working at MannCo?"

D: "Like dying and coming back to life or something?"

P: "Uh... in a way, yeah."

D: "I think I'd learn to live with it."

P: "Love the can-do attitude. Are you willing to undergo somewhat frequent medical procedures to ensure you're fit for work?"

Daffodil writes something. After a moment of deliberation, they cross it out and write something else.

D: "Yes."

P: "Perfect. We've determined you'd be best fitted as a Pyro at MannCo. You'd be eliminating the enemy team via burning, most likely with a flamethrower.. Do you think that would be a good fit for you?"

Daffodil writes their answer quickly.

D: "Yes"

P: Alrighty, that's about it. You're pretty much good to go. Anything you'd like to ask me?"

D: "Are you typing my answers?"

P: "Yeah. The system will note down what I say automatically, but since you're writing your answers I have to do your replies manually."

Daffodil nods.

D: "You're interviewing Nerf too, right?"

P: "Yep. He's right after you. Don't tell anyone, but you're pretty much already in the program. This interview is just a formality."

D: "Nerf had a pretty bad concussion. Would you mind if I stayed in the room with him while you interviewed him?"

P: "Uh... sorry, I can't do that. Privacy policy and all. But you're welcome to wait right outside the door instead of going back up to the room."

Daffodil nods.

P: "Alrighty, that's pretty much it if you don't have any more questions?"

Daffodil shakes their head.

P: "Cool. You can wait outside for Nerf."

TRANSCRIPT END